Friendship has been on my mind a lot lately. I feel like I have spent too much time being bitter over friendships I have lost along the way. I am trying to change that. Instead of being angry and hurt over the people who have cut me off, hurt me, or dismissed me, I am choosing to be thankful for the friends I do have. I am choosing to let go of the pain because there are two sides to every story and no one person is completely at fault in a broken friendship. I am choosing to let go and embrace the people in my life who have made such a difference and stuck by my side through all that I have been through. I have seen bloggers do friendship fridays, and while I don't have the discipline to blog every week, I am going to do my best to adopt this tradition and give recognition to those who have touched my life. Though I do miss friends from the past, I am trying to let go of the hurt and not let it affect my trust and my happiness. I want to surround myself with positive, loving, supportive, and faithful friends and I thank all of you who have been just that to me. =)
Here are some quotes about friendship that I believe to ring true:
A true friend is someone who sees the pain in your eyes while everyone else believes the smile on your face.
You meet people who forget you. You forget people you meet. But sometimes you meet those people you can't forget. Those are your friends.
A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.
Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget. - G. Randolf
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Monday, January 31, 2011
A-Z's About Me
Some of you who read this might not know that much about me... and though I am horrible at posting consistently, I am going to try to work on it!! I have so many deep issues on my mind, but today is an off day. So I decided to spin off the A-Z About Me idea that many bloggers have adopted. Here it goes...
ANIMALS are my passion. I have a very soft place in my heart for them and plan spend my life caring for them. I believe that they have a soul and are often better friends to us than our fellow human beings.
My BIRTHDAY is my favorite day of the year. It makes me feel appreciated and loved. So come March 27th.........
COOKING is not my forte. I am awful at it (though I am trying to learn!) and have a reputation for burning, setting fire to, and all-together ruining food. (Today pot-stickers were my victim...)
DENTISTS are not my favorite... I HATE going and will often come up with a million excuses for why I can't go. (I have good reason to repel them... my wisdom teeth extraction experience and my root canal experience were horrifying. Let's just say it is a good thing they use those bite-blockers otherwise he might have been missing a few fingers).
Waking up EARLY is not something that I enjoy... I will often sleep in until 1, 2, sometimes 3 PM if I have no where to be. I love sleeping in and am definitely a night owl by all means.
FIBROMYALGIA is a disease that I was diagnosed with in November of 2009. It is a nerve disorder that triggers pain and nausea. (Here is a link with more info...) Dealing with this illness has brought about a major lifestyle change that I have been struggling to adapt to and accept.
I like being the GIVER rather than the taker. I LOVE giving presents and making people happy. I love spoiling the people I care about. =)
HAPPILY EVER AFTER is a love story that I am waiting to fulfill! I can't wait to fall in love, get married, and have a family. (See "P" for patience...)
ICE CREAM is one of my favorite foods. I LOVE it! (Especially Cold Stone's Birthday Cake Remix... mmmm delish!)
JESUS is my Lord. He is my number one constant and I am continually learning and growing in Him. He stretches me to my limits (and sometimes past what I think my limits are) and challenges me consistently. Throughout my life I have has many ups and downs and what I have realized is that whenever I feel myself drifting from Him, He has never left my side... I just left His.
I want 2 to 3 KIDS (someday) and I already have their names picked out.
LISTS are a favorite of mine. I love making them almost as much as I love crossing things off them.
MOVIES are one of my two addictions... I own over 400 DVDs (and counting) and TONS of TV series. (Sweatshirts are the other addiction... I own SO many and yet I keep buying more!)
NAIL BITING is a dirty habit of mine. Before I discovered the wonders of gel nails I
would incessantly bite all of my nails until they would bleed. Gross, I know. It has now been three years that I have had gel nails on and it has helped me tremendously with the biting habit... well, I still bite but minimal damage ensues.
I am a little bit OCD. I keep my movies in alphabetical order. When I get gas, the total has to read something like $54.50, $42.22, $58.10, or something like that. And I absolutely cannot fall asleep if any clothes are sticking out of my drawers or closet... everything must be shut!
PATIENCE is a life lesson that I am learning right now. It isn't a fun one to learn, but one that is definitely necessary for me as I am probably one of the most impatient people on the planet.
QUIET is something that I am NOT. I am often told that I talk too loudly and too often. I also tend to repeat myself a lot (something that I am working on).
RISK-TAKING is something that I am good at. I love challenging myself and trying new things. I love adventure and seeking thrill! (A few things on my to-do list...
SOFTBALL was a huge part of my life. I played from the age of 7 all the way through college. I miss it terribly and wish that I were still able to play.
TUCKER is my kitten and my world. He is almost two years old (in April... oh. my. gosh.) and he is the other constant in my life. He is my best friend and he takes care of me more than I take care of him.
An UNUSUAL fact about me is that I don't like fruit. Don't get me wrong, I love the taste... it is the texture that I can't handle. (I've always been this way and so has my grandma. Don't ask me why because I couldn't tell you.)
Some VACATION spots I hope to hit are: Africa, Australia, and Europe.
WATER scares me a little... I am not the best swimmer and though I enjoy water sports (jet skiing and wake-boarding in particular) I have a fear of what lies beneath the surface... I try to keep my body out of the murky water as much as possible... you never know what's down there!!! (Tahoe is the one exception).
I have had many, many X-RAYS. Saying that I am accident prone is an understatement.
I YEARN to follow Jesus. I strive to live a life that is glorifying to Him and each day I try to make Him smile.
ZOOLOGY is my major... I plan to work with lions and tigers (and bears, oh my!) someday and I am mesmerized by wild animals (well, all animals, really..)
Hope this gives a better idea of who I am! I love learning random facts about people so I figured I would share a few of me. =)
ANIMALS are my passion. I have a very soft place in my heart for them and plan spend my life caring for them. I believe that they have a soul and are often better friends to us than our fellow human beings.
My BIRTHDAY is my favorite day of the year. It makes me feel appreciated and loved. So come March 27th.........
COOKING is not my forte. I am awful at it (though I am trying to learn!) and have a reputation for burning, setting fire to, and all-together ruining food. (Today pot-stickers were my victim...)
DENTISTS are not my favorite... I HATE going and will often come up with a million excuses for why I can't go. (I have good reason to repel them... my wisdom teeth extraction experience and my root canal experience were horrifying. Let's just say it is a good thing they use those bite-blockers otherwise he might have been missing a few fingers).
Waking up EARLY is not something that I enjoy... I will often sleep in until 1, 2, sometimes 3 PM if I have no where to be. I love sleeping in and am definitely a night owl by all means.
FIBROMYALGIA is a disease that I was diagnosed with in November of 2009. It is a nerve disorder that triggers pain and nausea. (Here is a link with more info...) Dealing with this illness has brought about a major lifestyle change that I have been struggling to adapt to and accept.
I like being the GIVER rather than the taker. I LOVE giving presents and making people happy. I love spoiling the people I care about. =)
HAPPILY EVER AFTER is a love story that I am waiting to fulfill! I can't wait to fall in love, get married, and have a family. (See "P" for patience...)
ICE CREAM is one of my favorite foods. I LOVE it! (Especially Cold Stone's Birthday Cake Remix... mmmm delish!)
JESUS is my Lord. He is my number one constant and I am continually learning and growing in Him. He stretches me to my limits (and sometimes past what I think my limits are) and challenges me consistently. Throughout my life I have has many ups and downs and what I have realized is that whenever I feel myself drifting from Him, He has never left my side... I just left His.
I want 2 to 3 KIDS (someday) and I already have their names picked out.
LISTS are a favorite of mine. I love making them almost as much as I love crossing things off them.
MOVIES are one of my two addictions... I own over 400 DVDs (and counting) and TONS of TV series. (Sweatshirts are the other addiction... I own SO many and yet I keep buying more!)
NAIL BITING is a dirty habit of mine. Before I discovered the wonders of gel nails I
would incessantly bite all of my nails until they would bleed. Gross, I know. It has now been three years that I have had gel nails on and it has helped me tremendously with the biting habit... well, I still bite but minimal damage ensues.
I am a little bit OCD. I keep my movies in alphabetical order. When I get gas, the total has to read something like $54.50, $42.22, $58.10, or something like that. And I absolutely cannot fall asleep if any clothes are sticking out of my drawers or closet... everything must be shut!
PATIENCE is a life lesson that I am learning right now. It isn't a fun one to learn, but one that is definitely necessary for me as I am probably one of the most impatient people on the planet.
QUIET is something that I am NOT. I am often told that I talk too loudly and too often. I also tend to repeat myself a lot (something that I am working on).
RISK-TAKING is something that I am good at. I love challenging myself and trying new things. I love adventure and seeking thrill! (A few things on my to-do list...
SOFTBALL was a huge part of my life. I played from the age of 7 all the way through college. I miss it terribly and wish that I were still able to play.
TUCKER is my kitten and my world. He is almost two years old (in April... oh. my. gosh.) and he is the other constant in my life. He is my best friend and he takes care of me more than I take care of him.
An UNUSUAL fact about me is that I don't like fruit. Don't get me wrong, I love the taste... it is the texture that I can't handle. (I've always been this way and so has my grandma. Don't ask me why because I couldn't tell you.)
Some VACATION spots I hope to hit are: Africa, Australia, and Europe.
WATER scares me a little... I am not the best swimmer and though I enjoy water sports (jet skiing and wake-boarding in particular) I have a fear of what lies beneath the surface... I try to keep my body out of the murky water as much as possible... you never know what's down there!!! (Tahoe is the one exception).
I have had many, many X-RAYS. Saying that I am accident prone is an understatement.
I YEARN to follow Jesus. I strive to live a life that is glorifying to Him and each day I try to make Him smile.
ZOOLOGY is my major... I plan to work with lions and tigers (and bears, oh my!) someday and I am mesmerized by wild animals (well, all animals, really..)
Hope this gives a better idea of who I am! I love learning random facts about people so I figured I would share a few of me. =)
Sunday, January 9, 2011
New year, New attitude
It has been quite some time since my last post. Holidays sure are a busy time of the year. Mine were full of roller-coasters: lots of ups and downs.
Around Christmas I had a pretty bad attitude (to say the least). I had been so looking forward to a long-awaited family cruise which we ended up needing to cancel at the last minute. I was heart-broken. I had been looking forward to a much needed time of relaxation and fun with family to celebrate an end to our struggles throughout the past few years. I was upset and angered at the fact that we could no longer go. I was so stuck on ruined plans and had forgotten about all of the blessings in my life. Christmas is not about presents under the tree (or even HAVING a tree). It is not about vacations and it is not about money. Christmas is about love- the love that we have for our friends and family, and most importantly the love that Christ has for us.
I had a conversation with my dad about our collapsed vacation and he said something to me that really hit home. Yes, we didn't have our usual tree; we didn't have our usual presents; we missed out on our vacation; and our disappointment kept growing and growing... BUT we have never missed a meal. We have a roof over our heads. We have so many things that most people in the world can only dream about. Sure, my car needs an oil change. My bathroom is in desperate need of remodeling. I really wouldn't mind owning a new camera, and our TV downstairs is on the fritz. But I have something that many people in our world envy: a loving family, a wonderful network of friends, and a God that loves me more than I can ever imagine.
This holiday season I have really been meditating on the fact that every single material possession is inadequate. The only thing I ever need, and the only thing that can truly satisfy, is the love of my God. I have been learning many lessons from Him this past year (and I am increasingly becoming convinced that He's got a sense of humor... and a funny way of teaching me the things I am too stubborn to accept). And though this has been a rough journey (which is no where near over), I (try to) welcome challenges with open arms and an open mind and heart.
I read a verse yesterday that rung true to my heart: "I will be glad and rejoice in your love, for you saw my affliction and knew the anguish of my soul." - Psalms 31:7
His love is all that we need and the only thing that sustains us.
Love and blessings for a wonderful New Year full of many surprises and lessons,
Melissa
Around Christmas I had a pretty bad attitude (to say the least). I had been so looking forward to a long-awaited family cruise which we ended up needing to cancel at the last minute. I was heart-broken. I had been looking forward to a much needed time of relaxation and fun with family to celebrate an end to our struggles throughout the past few years. I was upset and angered at the fact that we could no longer go. I was so stuck on ruined plans and had forgotten about all of the blessings in my life. Christmas is not about presents under the tree (or even HAVING a tree). It is not about vacations and it is not about money. Christmas is about love- the love that we have for our friends and family, and most importantly the love that Christ has for us.
I had a conversation with my dad about our collapsed vacation and he said something to me that really hit home. Yes, we didn't have our usual tree; we didn't have our usual presents; we missed out on our vacation; and our disappointment kept growing and growing... BUT we have never missed a meal. We have a roof over our heads. We have so many things that most people in the world can only dream about. Sure, my car needs an oil change. My bathroom is in desperate need of remodeling. I really wouldn't mind owning a new camera, and our TV downstairs is on the fritz. But I have something that many people in our world envy: a loving family, a wonderful network of friends, and a God that loves me more than I can ever imagine.
This holiday season I have really been meditating on the fact that every single material possession is inadequate. The only thing I ever need, and the only thing that can truly satisfy, is the love of my God. I have been learning many lessons from Him this past year (and I am increasingly becoming convinced that He's got a sense of humor... and a funny way of teaching me the things I am too stubborn to accept). And though this has been a rough journey (which is no where near over), I (try to) welcome challenges with open arms and an open mind and heart.
I read a verse yesterday that rung true to my heart: "I will be glad and rejoice in your love, for you saw my affliction and knew the anguish of my soul." - Psalms 31:7
His love is all that we need and the only thing that sustains us.
Love and blessings for a wonderful New Year full of many surprises and lessons,
Melissa
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Keep Your Head Up
I AM HORRIBLE AT MATH!! For my statistics class you have to get at least 70% on the "practice test" (which you can take as many times as you want up until tuesday night at 11pm) in order to take the test in class on wednesdays. This is probably the 4th or 5th time that I have NOT gotten at least a 70% on the quiz and have therefore been unable to take the test. And it isn't like I don't ask for help. I am in tutoring for this class alone at least 12 hours a week, probably more. It just doesn't seem to get through to me. I was doing really well in school up until Stats and Trig came along... always striving for A's and being the total perfectionist that I am. However, it is so hard for me to not give up! I already had to drop trig because I was failing, and now with stats, I really just want to quit! It is so hard to find the motivation to do the work, especially when I take the quiz over and over and over and the highest I can get is a 69.2% (I know... I was that close...) This class is frustrating me just about to my limit. I will be so glad come December 17th. Then it's back at it in January. Ughhhh.
I am choosing tonight to try and look on the bright side (now that I got my ranting out of the way) because I have had such a negative day. And in the spirit of Thanksgiving I am going to list some things that I am thankful for with the hopes of lifting my spirits...
First and foremost I am thankful for my God, who has remained ever-constant and has never left my side (even when I left his).
I am thankful that He is continually showing me His faithfulness through answered prayers and blessings.
I am thankful for my family who has been a great support system over the past two years.
I am thankful for my kitten, Tucker, who is truly my best friend on this earth. He is my comfort and my joy and the one being that I tell everything to. I do not know what I would do without him, for he understands me in a way that no human ever possibly could.
I am thankful for my friends as they are such an encouragement to me.
I am thankful for my church because it is a place where I can come as I am and still be excepted.
I am thankful for the beauty that I am seeing in everything. In the clouds and in the leaves, in smiles and in laughter.
I am thankful for the health I do have. And I can say that with 100% honesty. My condition sucks, but I could have it so much worse. And I am seeing that more and more each day. And when I do not feel well, whether it be pain or nausea, or whatever else, I try to remind myself that I am still blessed beyond measure.
When life's frustrations take their toll on me, I try to count the ways in which He has blessed me and proven to me time and time again that He loves me and He cares for me.
1 Peter 5:7 says, "Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you." (NLT)
Love and Thankfulness, Melissa
I am choosing tonight to try and look on the bright side (now that I got my ranting out of the way) because I have had such a negative day. And in the spirit of Thanksgiving I am going to list some things that I am thankful for with the hopes of lifting my spirits...
First and foremost I am thankful for my God, who has remained ever-constant and has never left my side (even when I left his).
I am thankful that He is continually showing me His faithfulness through answered prayers and blessings.
I am thankful for my family who has been a great support system over the past two years.
I am thankful for my kitten, Tucker, who is truly my best friend on this earth. He is my comfort and my joy and the one being that I tell everything to. I do not know what I would do without him, for he understands me in a way that no human ever possibly could.
I am thankful for my friends as they are such an encouragement to me.
I am thankful for my church because it is a place where I can come as I am and still be excepted.
I am thankful for the beauty that I am seeing in everything. In the clouds and in the leaves, in smiles and in laughter.
I am thankful for the health I do have. And I can say that with 100% honesty. My condition sucks, but I could have it so much worse. And I am seeing that more and more each day. And when I do not feel well, whether it be pain or nausea, or whatever else, I try to remind myself that I am still blessed beyond measure.
When life's frustrations take their toll on me, I try to count the ways in which He has blessed me and proven to me time and time again that He loves me and He cares for me.
1 Peter 5:7 says, "Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you." (NLT)
Love and Thankfulness, Melissa
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Hosanna
I have complete and utter sorrow in my heart for those who are suffering in Uganda and all over Africa, actually, all over the world. Tonight I had the wonderful privilege of hearing (for the second time!) a presentation from the organization, Invisible Children. In short, Invisible Children is an organization that works in Uganda and throughout Eastern Africa to save children from being abducted or murdered due to the war. (Here is their website for the whole story: http://www.invisiblechildren.com ) Each time I think about what is going on over there, my heart wrenches. These children have no idea of what a life of peace means. All that they know is war, violence, murder, illness, and suffering. Many of these children were abducted at a very young age by the rebels and watched their parent(s) be murdered right before their eyes. Imagine how horrible it must be to endure that, to have your entire family murdered, to be abducted and beaten, scared and alone. And to think that these kinds of things do not happen only in Uganda, but all over our world. I consider myself so fortunate.
Recently I have had a song on my mind. "Hosanna" means "save us." Here are some of the song's lyrics:
Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest.
Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest.
Heal my heart and make it clean.
Open up my eyes to the things unseen.
Show me how to love like you have loved me.
Break my heart for what breaks yours.
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause.
As I walk from earth into eternity.
There is so much aid that is needed all over the world. And it breaks my heart to hear about situations like the one in Eastern Africa. It is a constant battle of good versus evil because the devil is always at work. He is always trying to tear down the kingdom of God. But God is at work and we should be working right alongside Him to rectify the horrible acts that are taking place to God's children. I always wonder why God doesn't just put an end to it with the snap of His fingers. I do not doubt that he is capable of it, but sometimes I wonder why He allows acts like these to continue. And I guess I will never know until my work here is done and I am called home. But I do know that until I am, I have a job to do. And my job is to be the light of my Lord in a world of darkness. Though I cannot change the situation in Uganda, I CAN do my part in giving what I can financially and most importantly, praying and spreading the word. People need to be aware of the happenings of this world and Christians are called out to take a stand against evil, even if in the smallest way. Each time we do something nice for another being, we make God smile. And I have discovered that this is my daily goal: to make my God smile.
What amazes me about Invisible Children is that these kids have been through things that I can't even imagine being subjected to and they have this huge love for the Lord and amidst the violence and inequality and horrible horrible happenings in their lives, they strive for peace and they strive for a better life. I wish to do all that I can to help.
My prayer and hope is the God will continue to open my eyes and my heart. I want to live in the footsteps of Jesus. I want my heart to break for what His heart breaks and most of all I want to be a light in the darkness and an example of my God's love.
Love and Peace, Melissa
Recently I have had a song on my mind. "Hosanna" means "save us." Here are some of the song's lyrics:
Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest.
Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the highest.
Heal my heart and make it clean.
Open up my eyes to the things unseen.
Show me how to love like you have loved me.
Break my heart for what breaks yours.
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause.
As I walk from earth into eternity.
There is so much aid that is needed all over the world. And it breaks my heart to hear about situations like the one in Eastern Africa. It is a constant battle of good versus evil because the devil is always at work. He is always trying to tear down the kingdom of God. But God is at work and we should be working right alongside Him to rectify the horrible acts that are taking place to God's children. I always wonder why God doesn't just put an end to it with the snap of His fingers. I do not doubt that he is capable of it, but sometimes I wonder why He allows acts like these to continue. And I guess I will never know until my work here is done and I am called home. But I do know that until I am, I have a job to do. And my job is to be the light of my Lord in a world of darkness. Though I cannot change the situation in Uganda, I CAN do my part in giving what I can financially and most importantly, praying and spreading the word. People need to be aware of the happenings of this world and Christians are called out to take a stand against evil, even if in the smallest way. Each time we do something nice for another being, we make God smile. And I have discovered that this is my daily goal: to make my God smile.
What amazes me about Invisible Children is that these kids have been through things that I can't even imagine being subjected to and they have this huge love for the Lord and amidst the violence and inequality and horrible horrible happenings in their lives, they strive for peace and they strive for a better life. I wish to do all that I can to help.
My prayer and hope is the God will continue to open my eyes and my heart. I want to live in the footsteps of Jesus. I want my heart to break for what His heart breaks and most of all I want to be a light in the darkness and an example of my God's love.
Love and Peace, Melissa
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Counting My Blessings
I have been so overwhelmed the past few weeks when I think about all of the blessings that I have in my life. It has been wonderful because I am seeing the world in a new light and although I can always find something to complain about, like feeling sick, or traffic... I am constantly reminded that "it could be worse." For a long time I was angry and bitter about certain events and conditions in my life, and though God's purpose in those hardships has not yet been revealed to me, I am having a much easier time trusting Him.
I am trying this new thing where I come up with at least one thing that I am thankful for each day, and it has really helped me to put a positive spin on things. Today (and every day) I am thankful for the people that God has placed in my life. Each one of them has a specific purpose and presence that enriches my life. I am so unbelievably blessed beyond measure and I am forever thankful to each person who has impacted me. I have very much enjoyed learning from my friends in these past few months and continuing to grow in my faith and my walk with the Lord. I cannot thank them enough.
Love and Thanks, Melissa
I am trying this new thing where I come up with at least one thing that I am thankful for each day, and it has really helped me to put a positive spin on things. Today (and every day) I am thankful for the people that God has placed in my life. Each one of them has a specific purpose and presence that enriches my life. I am so unbelievably blessed beyond measure and I am forever thankful to each person who has impacted me. I have very much enjoyed learning from my friends in these past few months and continuing to grow in my faith and my walk with the Lord. I cannot thank them enough.
Love and Thanks, Melissa
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Compassion and Grace
Blogging has been on my mind for awhile now... It is something that I have wanted to do, just actually working up the discipline to sit down and write has been the challenge.
In my journey I have been learning so much about life, love, faith, and most of all, compassion and grace. Although I am unsure of how many people will actually take the time to sit down and read this, (and I thank all of you who do!) simply writing down my feelings and experiences, sharing them with those who listen, is glorifying to God. I have been so thankful to so many people for sharing pieces of their life with me, for this is how we learn from one another. And my hope in blogging is to perhaps shed some light on this crazy thing we call life and touch the heart of a friend or a stranger.
Love, Hope, and Discoveries, Melissa
In my journey I have been learning so much about life, love, faith, and most of all, compassion and grace. Although I am unsure of how many people will actually take the time to sit down and read this, (and I thank all of you who do!) simply writing down my feelings and experiences, sharing them with those who listen, is glorifying to God. I have been so thankful to so many people for sharing pieces of their life with me, for this is how we learn from one another. And my hope in blogging is to perhaps shed some light on this crazy thing we call life and touch the heart of a friend or a stranger.
Love, Hope, and Discoveries, Melissa
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